A Nauseating Performance

by Phil Rowe
Did you ever notice how some folks cannot resist making their presence known to people above them in the pecking order? They are the sort of people who just have to be noticed.

I remember well a trip to Barksdale AFB, Louisiana, for it was on that trip that I witnessed the most egregious example of such behavior. Our crew had been sent down to Barksdale to attend a short course for flight instructors and examiners. The base was headquarters for 2nd Air Force and the place was loaded with general officers.

On the day that we were to return to our home base in Indiana, it was necessary for us to wait around in the Base Operations building for a transport plane to pick us up. One of the other passengers on the plane was a full colonel returning to his own outfit.

It also happened that several general officers were gathered in that same area, awaiting departure of their own executive jet planes. They had been attending some sort of commanders' conference at Barksdale during the same period we were there.

The colonel walked into the lobby area of Base Operations and saw that sea of stars and "scramble egg" hats of one, two and three-star generals. We watched him from across the room and could see the absolute delight in his eyes as he beheld that group of generals.

Like a politician working a crowd that colonel moved about the room. He greeted and shook hands with nearly all of those generals, smiling and making small talk. We watched that all too obvious ploy to get attention and stroke the egos of the big shots waiting there. It was a nauseating spectacle.

I'm not really sure what that groveling and 'glad-handing' accomplished, but never before or since have I witnessed such a scene. And I wonder what, if anything, those generals thought of that over-eager colonel.

Oh yes, an epilog to this story must be told. That colonel later retired, still as a colonel. So I guess he didn't really impress those general favorably, after all. There is justice in this world.